Crunch Time

Sometimes life gets crunchy.  Your health goes increasingly berserker and you lose out on two months of your life to be in crippling pain.  You don’t get the job you thought you were a shoo-in for.  You have a suicide (prevention) themed work week the same week as your mother’s 18th suicide-a-versary and wind up hysterically crying at work.  You get stabbed in the leg with a screw.

A crunchy time is upon me, a crunchy time indeed.

But you know what?  Fuck it.  It’s fine.

Six weeks ago I changed to a plant-based diet to help the health mofo situation.  Now I eat very minimal processed foods, no dairy, no meat ‘cept fish, no gluten, no caffeine, and minimal added sugar and alcohol.  (1 pint Almond Dream frozen treat and 6 drinks, to be precise…)

I go to community acupuncture, I started taking NINE supplements everyday, and I bought (and use) an eliptical.  Today I feel better than I’ve felt in… a long time.  A really, really, really long time.  Thursday I felt like absolute dookie and cried from pain upon waking.  It’s a work in progress.  But…progress indeed.

Every time a job hasn’t worked out for me a better suited one has come along.  They are getting increasingly awesome.  I love the current one.  I’ll bet you an even cooler opportunity presents itself. Plus I’ve learned SO much in this position, I’m really grateful for the experience.  Progress indeed.

I dealt with a lot of pain from my mother’s death last week that I thought I had processed.  It still hurts.  That’s okay.  Ignoring that it hurts doesn’t serve me, looking at the pain and releasing it does.  Progress indeed.

I got STABBED in the leg with a fucking screw!  The ladder to my sleeping loft broke and I fell into the screws that were holding it together – OUCH!  But it’s healing fine, the ladder’s fixed, annnd my landlord is now considering getting me a spiral staircase.  Swooooon.  Progress indeed.

Some philosophical people call times like these times of contrast; loud and unignorable cries from your life that it’s time for change.  Others describe life’s progress as moving in contractions – getting crunchy then releasing and expanding.  Or like waves reaching closer to the shore, two feet out, then one foot back, then two feet out, then one back…

All waves get to shore eventually.

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